Do you struggle asking for help? Or accepting it? You're not alone, mama.
Many of us are challenged with taking up kind offers from family and friends. I recently saw a post that said "Nobody works harder than a woman who doesn't want to ask for help," and it really hit home for me. Why do we struggle in silence, especially as new moms? Taking up offers of support, being specific with your asks and leaning on your village are all critical steps to delegating tasks with ease.
TAKE UP OFFERS OF SUPPORT
Have you ever quickly responded "Oh no, I've got this," to someone offering you support? Yep, me too. We can be so quick to shrug off support in fear of being a burden, or perceived as weak. But here's the thing—if someone is offering to help, it means they want to help. So the next time someone asks if you need anything, take a pause and say "You know, since you asked, I could really use some help with [insert task here.]" Trust that your loved ones really do want to help, they often just don't know how.
Here are tasks you can delegate to family/friends as a new mom:
Light meal prep
Running small errands
Dishes & light cleaning
Walking the dog
If you don't have friends or family offering support, reach out to them! Direct communication is the most efficient approach for family, friends and even partners.
BE SPECIFIC WITH YOUR ASK
Be as specific as you can with your asks. Try using phrases like "I would love you to babysit for two hours so I can shower and take a nap," or "Can you please come over for one hour tomorrow to help me make a dent in the never-ending laundry?" Regardless of what you're needing help with, don't be afraid or embarrassed to communicate your needs. Not only is it crucial to your mental health, it is a key component of building healthy relationships. Still don't have the words? That's okay! Use my customizable "Here's How You Can Help..." Canva template that can be sent off to family/friends via text or email.
LEAN ON YOUR VILLAGE
Maybe your village consists of family, friends and neighbours. Or maybe it consists of daycare workers, cleaners and personal assistants. Regardless of what your village looks like, outsourcing and/or asking for help does not mean you're incapable. It means you're human.
Asking for, and accepting help, was a huge game changer for me! I encourage you to start implementing these tips right away and use the email template with your village. If you have anything to add, be sure to drop it in the comments below.